; lyht leaves the eyes—expelled by a relentless laesr of poignant realisation that reality is but absurdism x impossibility.

Thursday, 19 May 2011


as relatively eventful as my life is at the moment i am constantly filled with a simmering inner turmoil. the green tea in my madagascar penguin cup is stale and stagnates at the most repulsive state of lukewarm.

nightly i've gone through a painful ritual of reliving my teenage years (lololol as if those are far behind me, i still live with the remnants of my bullshit naivety) and it is very unsettling to remember the difficulty that i had making friends. is it possible to be unaware of your own deformity? because that's what it feels like. looking back, i am both fascinated and horrified by my ignorance of how little i had (in terms of friends, possessions and support). i have lead an ugly life.

as if this isn't morose enough, this moodiness has translated into laziness and all i can bring myself to do is watch ABC's what would you do on youtube in parts. when i ask myself what i'd do, i know prematurely that i would only have strength enough to walk away.

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